Jealous
by Azrael'sLoveChild
Summary: When a new CSI fills in for Ella, Chloe develops a small crush on the man, while Lucifer wants to crush him.
1. Chapter 1

/Just a short story for amusement as I await my muse to return from her vacation. Disclaimer: There's no need for a disclaimer. I own nothing./

"Did you see his butt? It was so firm looking. Chloe like. Think he'd let me bite it a little?", Chloe asked no one in particular.

"Yes, Detective, every female in here saw his gluteous maximus. What makes something you sit on so special? Who is he anyway?"

"No idea. I've never seen him, at least from the back, before. I'd remember that ass. Let's go find out."

She caught up to the man and tapped him on the shoulder. When he turned to her her libido turned on. He looked just like Johnny Depp. Chloe almost drooled on the man's shoes. He was so hot.

"Hi, I'm Chloe, Detective Decker."

"I'm Rod Long. I'll be your new CSI."

"Rod Long? Is that really your name? Did you do porn as you worked your way through college?"

"Lucifer, don't be rude", she said smacking his arm, "Another CSI? Well, welcome to the team."

"Well, I actually I'll be filling in for someone named Ella Lopez. She is off on sabbatical. Said God called her to go, so the county gave her time off for religious reasons."

"I highly doubt he called her. He's too busy plotting against me."

"Lucifer, now is not the time to let the new guy see your Luciferness."

Rod smirked at them, "Is this your boyfriend?"

"Oh, gosh no. He's just a civilian consultant. That's all."

"Just a consultant? Detective, without me, you wouldn't solve one case. Excuse us, Rod. We have work to do", he said dragging Chloe away from the man.

Rod shook his head and walked into the lab. He thought Lucifer was her man, guess he was wrong. Prick, making fun of his name when he was named Lucifer. Were his parents devil worshipers?

"Detective, you were acting like a school girl with that man. What has come over you?"

"Lucifer, he looked like Johnny Depp. So hot!", she said biting her lip.

"I don't know, I thought he looked more like Johnny Knoxville. You know, the jackass."

"You're so rude, I think you really are Satan, sometimes. I swear."

Lucifer rolled his eyes, "That's what I've been telling you this whole time."

"Lucifer you say a lot of things. You never stop talking. I bet you even run your mouth when you're in bed with..whoever."

"I'll take that bet. I'd be more than glad to show you I can use my mouth for other things than talking,"he said with an eyebrow wiggle.

She smacked him with the file in her hand, "Seriously, you'd say anything to get in my pants."

"Maybe if I changed my name to 'Rod', you wouldn't resist so much."

Chloe walked away, going into the lab with Rod. She had to see if those blood samples turned up anything. And seeing Rod's nice butt wouldn't be so bad either. Lucifer followed her in, not at all pleased.

"So, did you find anything, Rod?"

"Not yet, but I did notice something odd in this soil sample. This insect here, comes from Arizona and it's not naturally found in California at all. Take a look at it. It's an Apache Cicada."

He moved away from the microscope, making room for Chloe. As she bent over and looked into it, he gave her ass a once over and gave Lucifer a thumbs up. Lucifer's eyes flared red at the man, but he didn't seem to notice. Lucifer was going to have to make this guy disappear.

"So, detective, what do you for fun when you're off work?"

"Well, I'm a single mother, so there's really no time for fun. What do you do?"

"I'm a Cosplayer. I do Captain Jack Sparrow and Pirates role play on the weekend with my friends."

"J-j-jack Sparrow… how sexy..I mean cool. That's cool."

Chloe had a secret obsession with the good captain and knowing this look-alike also did dress-up did something to Chloe. She had butterflies in her belly and her face felt hot. Lucifer looked at her knowingly. The detective was turned on.

"Well, thank-you, Rod, but we must be going. Got a murder to solve and all that. Have a pleasant day."

"Hey, Chloe. You maybe wanna come see me do my R.P. this weekend?', Rod asked, flashing her a 100 watt smile.

"I'd like that, thanks."

"You, you can't I have a surprise for you this weekend", Lucifer said, covering quickly. He was not letting her go anywhere with that tool.

"Raincheck, then. Until we meet again, Detective,"Rod said kissing her hand.

Chloe made an undecipherable noise and let Lucifer lead her from the lab. He was livid and was experiencing an emotion he never felt before. The green-eyed monster named jealously.

"I forbid you from speaking to him anymore."

"You can't forbid me from doing anything, Lucifer."

"I just did."

"You're unbelievable. How many women have you flaunted in front of me, blew me off for? You don't get to tell me what to do. If I want to go watch his cosplay, I will."

"Okay, nerd. Be bored. I tried to save you", he said, deflecting her accusation.

Monday came too quickly for Chloe. She had spent two amazing days with Rod. When she showed up at the precinct that morning, she found Lucifer waiting for her. He grabbed her by the shoulders and sniffed her all over.

"Funny, you don't smell like sex. And you don't have a happy, "I got laid" smile either."

"I didn't have sex, pig. Even if I did, I don't see how it's your business."

"We're partners. Everything you do is my business."

"Look, I have to check in with Rod and see if he's got any new information this morning. He said he was coming in early to work on it since I distracted him."

"I'm sure. We'll let's get this over with."

"Lucifer, what is your problem?"

"I don't like that guy. I don't trust him."

"He met Trixie Sunday. She didn't like him, either. He's so kind and sweet. I don't see what you guys dislike so much."

"Jeffery Dahmer and Ted Bundy were quite 'sweet', too, Chloe."

"He's not a serial killer, Lucifer, my god."

"And there you go, invoking his name."

"Lucifer, I haven't had coffee yet, can you wait twenty minutes or so before you get weird?"

"You have 19 minutes and thirty seconds, do what you need to do, detective."

Music was playing as the entered the lab and they found Rod singing along. Dan was waiting in the doorway with a stack of files in his arms, "Where's Ella, all the lab work is backed up and this... this Douche is dancing to Beyonce."

Lucifer threw back his head and laughed, it was a rare moment for him to agree with Dan. Dan would always be the douche but it was funny to hear him call that particular name to anyone else.


	2. Chapter 2

Tuesday dragged along. They had cases to work but Rod was backlogged by 30 pieces of evidence. He was far too busy dancing or finding a reason to touch Chloe. Lucifer lost count after the 100th time he stroked the detective's cheek as he spoke to her in a mock Jack Sparrow voice and quoted lines from the movie. It was disturbing as well as disgusting. What made it worse, was the fact that she giggled like a school girl in an anime movie when the lout did it. Couldn't she see it was all an act? He was as phony as they come. Lucifer was going to have to do something drastic if he wished to pry Chloe away from 'Rod through the brain'.

The Captain came marching down the hall just as Rod was pushing Chloe's hair away from her face."What in the name of Jesus, Mary and Joseph is going on here? Nothing is getting done and several detectives are getting very upset. Do you think that you can stop fondling Decker long enough to accomplish something? Decker, don't you and Mr. Morningstar have work to do?"

Lucifer took Chloe by the arm and led her from the evidence room, "Come along, we have some family members to interview."

Chloe followed, chewing the inside of her cheek. She really wasn't paying any attention until Lucifer gave her a shake, "Well, do you want to?"

"What? Want to what?"

Frustrated, Lucifer yelled at her, "I said, do you want to do the interviews now or wait until you have your paperwork sorted. Why are you in such a fog, Detective?"

"I just thinking about last night, with Rod. He brought me dinner, it was so sweet. Ya, know guys these days try to give you what they think you want with little thought to what you need."

"Did he bring food for the spawn as well?"

"No, she had a macaroni and cheese cup and went to bed. She was so mad he showed up, she didn't even ask for a bed time story."

* * *

 _I tried to cook you breakfast and was unceremoniously kicked out. I've spent countless dollars buying you lunches you become too busy to eat. I've gone out of my way to deliver pizza or hamburgers to your offspring when you were so wrapped up in a case, you left her with an overnight sitter, whom I paid and told her to tell you it was a freebie. Did your daughter tell you of the times I read her bedtime stories while you were away? Oh, Chloe, if I had brought you dinner, it would have been for you and Beatrice. It's no wonder she was upset._

* * *

 _"_ Very enlightening isn't it, how children react to certain individuals?

"Yeah, kinda. She adores you and your Luciferness but hates a completely normal guy."

"You wound me, detective. At least the spawn likes me, it's more than I can say for her mother."

"Anyways, what was it you said we had to do? I am a bit scatterbrained today."

"Detective, have a coffee and clear the Rod cloud from your mind. I find I can't communicate with you, right now."

Lucifer leaned against the sink as Chloe poured a cup of that sludge the department called coffee. Never in all his his days, had he seen the beverage as it was here, thick with the consistency of wet sand. The first time he drank it it felt as if his throat was being exfoliated from the inside.

Chloe watched Lucifer from the corner of her eye and smiled inwardly. She could only guess what was going on his his mind right now. She only hoped that he felt the way she did every time she saw him with some beauty who's body was going to keep him warm for a night. She wanted him jealous and if poor Rod was what it took, so be it. Sh

"Hey, Lucifer. I put you on Trixie's emergency contact forms at her school. Do you think you can pick her up for me this afternoon? I have a mini date with Rod. I shouldn't be more than an hour or so. Please, partner?", the look on his face spoke volumes.

"I suppose I could, after all, she does like me best."

"Well, you'll always have that going for you. Thanks for the favor, I owe you big time," she said leaning forward to kiss his cheek.

"You do indeed, detective," he said, rocking on his heels. "I believe your moppet and I shall go shopping. I remember you saying she needed new shoes."

"I did? Must have slipped my mind. If you want to do that with her you can, but try to keep the price under $50.00. I'll pay you back when I can."

"Chloe, shoes are not going to make me destitute, I'll find her some that will last. What size is she?"

"4.5 kids."

Chloe got home around 6:30 pm and walked into the living room and was greeted by a couch covered in shoe boxes. Lucifer was at the stove, taking something out of the oven and Trixie jumped off the bar stool to greet her mother.

"Mommy, Lucifer and I went and got me shoes."

"Looks like you got the whole shoe store, monkey."

"Mommy, a girl needs shoes. I got a pair for school, a pair for dress-up, rain boots and a few pairs of play shoes. Lucifer made us lasagna for dinner, too! From scratch. He even made the noodles."

"Did you thank Lucifer for his generosity?"

"Of course mommy. Lucifer is always nice to me."

"Well ladies, come sit. I have salad, lasagna and 5 cheese garlic toast. Enjoy your meal. I'll see you both tomorrow."

"Lucifer, stay. Eat with us, you did all the work, at least enjoy it", Chloe offered.

"I don't know. I'll stay but only if Beatrice wants me to."

"I do, I really do."

He hung up his jacket and went to sit with his girls. For the first time in days, he felt normal. Until the elephant in the room reared it's ugly head.

"Mommy, did you and Rot I mean Rod have a fun play date?"

"Actually baby, no. Mommy waited but Rod never came."

"Good, I can't ship a couple called 'Chod', I prefer Chlucifer anyway."

"What are you talking about, girl?", Chloe asked shaking her head at her child.

"Mommy, I ship you with Lucifer, you guys are my OTP."

Lucifer smirked at the detective and quickly shoved a big bite of the pasta in his mouth, "My compliments to the chef."


	3. Chapter 3

Chloe shook her head at the man in her kitchen. He had cooked dinner, put away the leftovers and did the dishes. He was now making Trixie's lunch for tomorrow. She wondered for a moment if he was possessed by the spirit of June Cleaver. He wouldn't let her help him, insisting she rest after being stood up by Rod. She was sipping the coffee he made her when her phone rang. She put it on speaker and laid her head on the table. No more work tonight, she prayed. She was too full to move.

"Decker."

"Hey, it's Rod. I'm sorry I missed you. They made me finish processing the evidence before I could go home. You guys sure have a lot of work here. In Bakersfield, we may have one piece of evidence in a week, I'm not used to this."

"It's no problem. I had to get home to my kid anyway."

"Hey about her, do you think you could ditch her this weekend, ya know, maybe pack her off to her dad so we can be alone?"

Lucifer snatched the phone off the table and shouted into it,"She will not ditch her child for you or anyone else. If you take offense to this, visit me tomorrow, you foul little cretin."

He hung up the phone and tossed it back to her. She wanted to be mad and yell at him for sticking his nose in her business but she couldn't. Rod was way out of line. How dare he ask her to just ditch Trixie?

"Miserable little sh..Detective, you must end this tryst you're having with him at once. It is, as you humans say, not working."

She knew that. He stood her up this afternoon. And now this. She closed her eyes and laid her head on her arms. This always happened to her. They wanted her but her kid was always in the way. She was going to die alone, surrounded by cats.

"Tomorrow, we're going to the animal shelter, Lucifer."

"What, why?"

"I'm adopting a few cats. If I'm going to be alone until Trixie goes to college, I may as well be surrounded by cats."

"Don't get a Siamese, they are fussy buggers. Come on, Chloe. You'll find someone who tolerates your child."

"You're the only man in my life who even speaks to her. The two men I have dated since the divorce seemed to think she should be in the background of my life. Not the center of it. And Dan, he's just too busy to be bothered. I gotta face facts. I'll be alone for at least ten more years."

 _If you won't be with me, Chloe, I'd rather you be alone. I'm a selfish bastard._

"You'll find someone, one day. He's probably right under your nose and you just don't see how much he cares for you."

"Lucifer, I gave up on finding the 'One' a long time ago. I don't believe in fairy tales or fantasy. I have to be rational and face reality. I'm destined to be a crazy cat lady."

She expected some off- color remark, maybe a wise crack but instead she got a smile, "I'm sure it's not as bad as all that."

"Can I tell you a secret? I'm sure you're the last person I should be telling this to, but you're all I've got."

"Not very flattering but do share. I'm here for you."

"This is hard for me to say and I don't even know why I feel the need to share this but, Lucifer, it's been 3 years, 3 long years since I've, ya know, had sex."

"And I thought my 4 day drought was bad, Detective, that's a tragedy. Surely you can find a man to 'fill your void' for you. If you desire, I'll help you out."

"Why didn't I see that coming? Of course you'd offer yourself."

"I didn't mean me, I meant I'd be your wing man. Both men and women can't resist me. I could help you find a husband for a night." _Or I could ruin every date you go on. Either way, I'm assisting._

"You might not understand this, but I want more than a one night thing. I want forever."

"I can find you an immortal, but I have my doubts that they would remain immortal around you."

"And there it is, that trademark Luciferness. All you need is a cape and a catchphrase and you could be in a comic book."

He gave her a dismayed look as he zipped Trixie's lunchbox, setting it in the fridge, "The devil may wear Prada darling ,but he does not wear a cape."

Chloe walked over to the sink and sat her coffee mug down, "I don't know, I think you might look super cute in a cape."

He hit her with the towel he used to dry the dishes, "You are an evil little minx, you know that."

She leaned back against the counter and crossed her arms, smiling at him, "Listen, I want to thank-you for everything you've done today. From the shoes to the dishes. You've really went out of your way for us today. I don't know how I can repay you, and don't you dare say sex, but thank-you."

"Would it be too much to ask you for a hug? Even the devil needs a snuggle every now and again."

She wrapped her arms around him and stepped closer, "I wish you would stop referring to yourself as the devil. You're the best guy I know and one of the sweetest men I have met in my life. You're always there for me."

He stroked her back a couple of times before letting her go. He then took her by the shoulders and kissed her cheek, "You don't need to thank me, Chloe. It was what you needed. Goodnight."

He was gone before she got a chance to reply. He gave her a night off, which was exactly what she needed. Not what he thought she wanted, but exactly what she needed. Well, shit.


	4. Chapter 4

"Good morning Detective, I trust you slept well."

"No, Lucifer. I got no sleep. I kept myself awake thinking about what to do about Rod. You were right. I have to end things with him. I can't be with a man who can't accept the fact that my child is my number one priority."

"Would you like me to accompany you when you tell him?"

 _I'd love to see the look on his face._

"No, I better do this on my own. If you're there, he'll blame you."

"Detective, I get blamed for the failures and misdeeds of humans all the time. On a daily basis, to be exact. What do I care if he blames me? What if he gets violent or angry? You may need back-up."

"This is Rod we're talking about, Lucifer. If anything happens, I'll call you, okay."

Chloe walked into the lab, determined to end things on the right foot. She didn't want any animosity between them while he was working there. Ella wouldn't be back for two more weeks. She found Rod grinding on the table to 'Sorry' by Justin Bieber. Yep, time to end this.

"Hey, Rod. Can we talk?"

He rolled off the table and danced towards her, shaking his butt. She grabbed the remote and killed the music. He was more immature than Trixie.

"Listen, Rod. I don't think we should see each other anymore. It's just not working."

"I know, right! I went out with Michelle last night. She's more my speed. No kids, just cats."

"Michelle, the secretary in booking?"

"Yeah, I met her cats last night. Larry, Moe and Curly. Why are they all girls with boy names? And her cat Curly is, like bald. I don't get it. But whatever, she's available whenever and doesn't have to hire a sitter. She also doesn't come with a side of British psycho."

Instead of saying anything, she calmly walked back out into the hall and back to Lucifer. She was biting her lip to keep from laughing. The whole thing was absurd.

"Well, how did the break-up of the century turn out, Detective?"

"He took it well. He's already seeing someone else."

"Oh? And just who would this new goddess be, who caught the eye of Captain Jack?"

"Michelle in booking."

"The cat lady? Ah, yes, she is special, that one."

"Did you sleep with her, too?",Chloe asked, feeling just a tad bit insecure.

Lucifer held up his hands in a defensive gesture, "No, no, no. I complimented her on a fur stole she was wearing one time. She informed me that it was made from the fur of three of her dead cats."

"Disgusting. I guess she and Rod will happy together. He has two taxidermy parrots from his role play at his place."

"Vile. Oh, that's disturbing. I'm glad you've seen the light."

"Yep. As the kids say, hashtag forever alone."

 _Let me tell you about forever, Chloe._

"So, what do we have today? Any cases?"

"There was a weird call this morning. Come to my desk, I'll show you the file. It makes no sense, really."

At her desk, she handed Lucifer the folder and he opened it, reading the transcript of the call that came in around 5:00 am. The caller had said 'Deckerstar Forever' and hung up the phone. They couldn't run a trace because the call time was too short.

Lucifer schooled his features and handed the file back to her, "You're right, it makes no sense at all."

"I guess we'll have to see if anything comes up from it. I'll just file it away for now."

 _Indeed we will. In the meantime, I'm going to have to give your daughter a lesson in the art of being subtle._


End file.
